Moving Through The Fear of Stepping Up

There are bubbles of nerves in my belly. My hands feel cold, and a little clammy. Uneasiness niggles at me. I feel a strange sense of anticipation.  My mind is jumpy and distracted.

I breathe deeply in to the discomfort. I use my inhalation to expand into the constriction. And as I exhale I release the heavy energy within me. I plant my feet firmly on the ground and find temporary comfort in it’s strong feeling of support.

But then my mind kicks off again on a jittery train of thought. Fear-driven energy rambles through my head. I feel scattered and anxious.

This is what it feels like when you are standing on the edge of making one of those big, life-altering decisions. A decision that terrifies you, challenges you and requires you to break through the limitations you have placed upon yourself.

I have found myself at these crossroads many time at the past. I call them my daring moments. Where you make a decision that changes the course of your life forever. Where life dares you and says “What’s it gonna be? Are you going to show up or are you going to run away?”

This is your chance to decide. Back away, retreat and hide out of fear. Or show up bravely and powerfully for what you love.

 

When Life Calls You To Step Up

The process of stepping up in your life is so intimately unique to you, and you alone. It is not the size of the decision or what it entails and it doesn’t have anything to do with the specific circumstances that are unfolding.

The process is about what it stirs in you. What it requires of you. The extent to which it challenges your perceptions of yourself, tests your limitations and beckons you into the unknown.

So, here is mine.

I have just been offered a beautiful new apartment. It is stunning. Everything I had dreamed of when I closed my eyes and imagined my gorgeous new home. My heart leaped the minute I saw it. My soul said a resounding yes. My whole body vibrated with a powerful knowing and as soon as I walked out I sent a message to my current flatmate and said “I’ve found my home. It is the one”

If all I needed to do was follow that gorgeous, divinely inspired feeling, I would be fine. But that feeling has taken me way outside the perception I have of what is possible for me. Following this feeling will require me to stretch my mind. To let go of my set ideas about money, what I believe I am capable of, what I think I can or can’t afford, and what I can handle.

So what do you do when you stand, teetering on the edge of fear, being pulled forward by your heart, but feeling paralysed by the thoughts in your mind?

Here is what I did..

 

1. Notice Your Self Imposed Limitations

When I started apartment hunting, all I found were places that weren’t right. I would occasionally come across something I loved, but then if it fell outside of my budget I would right it off. I had to start to recognise where I was placing fear-driven limitations on my love-driven heart’s desire.

My heart longed to live in a spacious, beautiful home, yet I was telling myself it wasn’t possible and making my heart settle for something it didn’t truly want. The minute I started to lift my limitations and only view the places that felt truly right, was the exact moment I found my dream home.

 

2. Expand Your Mind And Open To New Possibilities

Initially my mind didn’t even let me entertain the idea of living somewhere that exceeded my pre-determined budget. But I decided to have a curious mind and playful spirit and practise opening up to a new idea. What if I actually could afford to live in an apartment I loved?

When you think in limitations, all you do is focus on why you can’t do something and why it is not possible. But when you open your mind to dream in possibilities you start to explore how you can make it work, and suddenly new opportunities appear before you.

 

3. Dive Deep Into Fear & Process It Fully

When I got the call offering me the apartment, I literally shut down in fear. The words “I can’t do it” and “This is too big for me” ran through my head. Luckily I was able to get on the phone to two of my incredible soul sisters and talk it out. As I opened my heart, expressed my fear and cried to these gorgeous souls they lovingly listened and supported me. I let myself continue to feel all of the fear, as I sat on the beach and sobbed.

As I moved through the emotion something shifted in me. A space cleared and I was suddenly able to hear my inner guidance again. She spoke quietly, yet powerfully “You can do this honey. I’ve got you“

 

4. Take The Step In Front Of You, And Forget The Rest

All I had to do in that moment, was call the agent and say yes. I didn’t have to worry what was going to happen in 2 weeks, a month or 6 months. That was irrelevant and I know from experience that life can drastically change in an instant.

I just had to follow that powerful, palpable energy within me which was calling me forward towards what I loved. I didn’t need to think, plan or worry. I just had to show up for the decision that lay at my feet in the moment, and trust that the next time a step needed to be taken, I would be supported to take that one too.

 

Moving Beyond The Fear

And once you do all this, there may still be fear. You may still be standing in the face of uncertainty having no idea how you are going to pull this off.

But once you move through your process, a new feeling will arise. A strange sense of calm will bubble up. A sense of knowing emerges. There is an inner certainty, based on no logic at all, that everything is going to be fine. More than fine. You have got this. You can do it.

And so I am doing it. I am moving in to my own home, expanding the idea of what I had previously thought was possible for me, and opening up to receive more from life.

I am busting through limiting stories of what I am capable of and re-defining who I think I am. I am releasing stories about what I think I can and can’t afford, beliefs about my ability to support myself and how I show up in the world.

This is about truly owning what you want. Going after that bright, bold, heart-driven dream. No longer compromising. Throwing out the excuses. And then showing up to face that fear voice that tells you can’t do it, and still doing it anyway.

 

Are you sitting on a the verge of an up-levelling experience? Is your heart calling you to step up and claim what you want? Leave me a comment and tell me what you will take on board from this post to help you.

 

Would you love some support? Email [email protected] to book a free Discovery Session and find out more about how my 1:1 coaching program can support you to move beyond your fear and claim what you truly want.

With love,

Connie x