Over the past few days I have been feeling a strong yearning to reconnect with the why behind what I do, and really tune in to see where I have been deviating from this.
While I know I love what I do, there are times when the love gets squeezed out of it. I have previously shared with you how fear hijacked my passion, but this time I feel it runs deeper than that.
I have been feeling a need to reconnect with why I actually began my journey. My journey in to writing on a blog, becoming a coach and launching a business.
Why I Began
I have to be honest. When I started, it was all about me. It was all about how I felt when I was immersed in this work.
I would have tingles of inspiration flow through me when I wrote. A heart-bulging power of love overcame me when I spoke to others about this content. Excitement arose when I followed this feeling and took courageous steps to dive deeper and share it with the world.
That feeling has been tugging at me again, asking me to reconnect with it. To take my attention off the outcomes, the results, the clients, the sales and to come back to me.
To come back to the love I feel in myself when I do this work, rather than focusing on the love I receive from others for that work that I do.
As soon as my attention goes on the external, I lose the love.
So, at the moment it is really about re-connecting with the love. And it is the love, that is my why.
It Is Not Just About Doing What You Love
I am currently completing a phenomenal 12 month mentoring program with Amir Zoghi and the work that I am doing in this program is allowing me see myself and my world in a completely new way.
I am learning that the love I experience for this work, is not just about what I do. This is not just about doing what I love. This is about being love.
I have began to see that I do not love this work because of what I am doing, but rather because of the person I become when I do it.
The love comes from the space I allow myself to drop in to when I write or coach or speak or create. Because of the energy I allow to flow through me. I love the experience of being in that space. It is what makes me feel alive. And that is all that matters.
Remembering My Why
So reconnecting with my why is not just about doing more of what I love. I am already doing that.
Rather, it is about checking in with who I am being while I am doing it. Or in fact, who I am being in general.
How much of me am I allowing to flow through in each moment? How present am I? How connected am I? How in tune am I with my inner being? How alive do I feel?
Coming back to my why is about making the love I feel in each moment more important than the love I am receiving.
It is about allowing the love I feel to drive my decisions, my actions and my creations.
No agenda. No striving for outcomes. Just love.
Have you ever at times felt like you have lost touch with the why behind what you do? How have you supported yourself to reconnect with it? Share your experiences in the comments below.
With love,
Connie x
Hi Connie,
I got all teary eyed when I read this:
I have began to see that I do not love this work because of what I am doing, but rather because of the person I become when I do it.
Thank you for that beautiful perception.
XO
Sabrina
Oh Sabrina I felt teary when I wrote it! xx
I think this was the perfect time for me to read this. I’m not sure I have more to say, or maybe I have too much to say! But, thank you as always for sharing, Connie. 🙂
Sometimes no words need to be said Erika xx
I love this post Connie! Thank you so much for being so honest, as always. I am just starting out on my blogging journey, & I’m also training to be a Holistic Health Coach. I am trying to stay focused on my ‘why’ & not get caught up in all the other stuff. As much as I want to help others, my ‘why’ is about me too – I am healing & growing, & I feel like I am starting to teach the things I need to learn. As I share them with others, they become more ingrained in me & keep me focussed on what I need to do to stay well & happy. xx
It can be really challenging to keep our attention on ourselves when we are in the type of industry that supports others. But I love what you share here about ‘teaching the things you need to learn’ This really is the ultimate way to empower others xx
What gorgeous words, Connie. I definitely have lost touch with my why before (am only just getting it back). Taking time for myself and focusing on being in the moment to find clarity really helped. I was overwhelmed with options and uncertainty. I found that it all came together perfectly and in good time 🙂 Thanks for the beautiful honesty xo
I totally agree Jacqueline. Just coming back to the here and now and taking some time out for ourselves really helps reconnect us with that deep inner driving force that pulls us forward xx
Great post, Connie!
I’ve been feeling in to the exact same thing over the last couple of weeks. Even though I’ve only had Pockets of Peace for a few months now, I had begun to nail aspects of my self worth on to the external reactions or responses to my writing, and have seen myself drift slightly away from the fundamental ‘why’ I write in the first place. I write because it plugs me in to source energy and allows me to creatively express in this world. Whatever comes back the other way is none of my business and shouldn’t distract from this fundamental why.
This is a challenge the ego certainly wrestles with, but we must persist!
C xx
Yep it is a moment to moment practice of being away when our attention is wandering outside of ourselves. It sounds like you and I have very similar ‘whys’ behind what we do. It is reassuring to hear that i am not the only one who drifts from my why from it to time! xx
Thank you for sharing with me (and everyone else). I had the a very similar realisation last week. I became lost in the analytics of my blog, and realised I was using the blog to gain love outside of me. Once I realised this I came back to why I started a blog about loving yourself. I was then rekindled with my passion – I love to share, I love to love, and I love to inspire. That is why I am writing. Now, I am more inspired and loved!