Re-Define Your Identity

Before you begin reading this post, I want you to ask yourself this one question and notice what arises in you.

Who am I?

Based on your answers, notice where you find your identity. Do you find your identity in what you do?

Is it through the role you play in your family? The job you do? The views you hold? The way you spend your spare time? The name you have? The body you inhabit?

What if who you were ran deeper than that?

And what if suddenly, all of that got taken away. Who would you be without it?


Finding Identity Through Doing

Most of us attach who we are to what we do and to forms outside of ourselves. It is these attachments that block us from truly getting to know who we are.

Seeing we are continually building and create our identity though what we do, we feel a constant need to do more. We work harder. We get more things. We make more money.

We think that if we can build more of an identity through the external then we will feel more. But this often leads us on an endless journey of striving and seeking.

And underneath all of it, is a deep fear that without this identity we would in fact be nothing.


Building An Identity Through The Story 

As I continue to grow and evolve on my journey of self awareness and consciousness I have been able to really see how strongly I have been finding my sense of identity through my business, my job title and what I do.

Not only that, but how closely I associate with the story of what I do.

I have found myself becoming attached to this story and therefore trying to build up a stronger sense of identity through the story. I have been seeking to feel more in myself by doing more in my work.

Over the past few days I have been sitting with the feeling of what it would be like to not be doing the work I am doing. If for example, I was not working in my business. If I was not a life coach. If I did not play the role of inspiring and empowering others, who would I be?

It was not until I sat with those questions that I realised how strongly I was attached to what I do.

The thought of not being this person or doing this work or having this business suddenly left me feeling empty, scared and lost.


Re-Defining My Identity

For me personally, I feel I am getting closer and closer to knowing who I really am  every day.

I want to not only know it, but to live it. To live as who I feel I really am, rather than as my identity my stories and the roles I play or the things I have.

In this way of living you are not defined or limited by anything outside of you. You are safe, whole and complete in your self – in your knowing of yourself, rather than in what you do.

When something outside of you is taken away or does not go how you feel you want it do, it does not take anything away from you and who you are.

For me, this is an ongoing practice of continuing to let go of what I am not so that I can truly experience who I am. Letting go of attachments, of stories and of all the ways I find identity in what I do.

And then once again coming back to the question

Who am I?


Do you ever feel that your identity becomes intertwined with what you do? Who do you feel you really are?

With love,


5 thoughts on “Re-Define Your Identity”

  1. Its such an easy pattern to fall into. A great post. It doesnt help the world we live in will often judge and define us based on what we do and what we have. It takes so much courage to learn to detatch from those external things and keep searching for that peace within ourselves. Nice one! Yay!

    1. Yes, living this way is really about un-learning so much of what we have learnt and how we are taught to live so that we can find our OWN truth. Glad you enjoyed the post beautiful x

  2. Thanks for this beautiful post, Connie! My question is only that: but if weare no what we do, if we are not our story, if we are not …..what is left? who am I?

    1. The million dollar question Daniella! What a beautiful space to arrive at. It is when you ask that question and you have no answer that you are on the verge of a breakthrough. Just keep sitting with the confusion rather than trying to figure it out. As you go deeper on your journey, your answer will come to you x

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