Are You Always Striving For More?

As I sit at the beginning of this fresh new year, I feel excitement and anticipation about the magic that lies ahead, but at the same time I have a calm sense of detachment and ease about what will unfold.

In the past I would set lofty goals and dream up big visions that I would strive to achieve. But this year, there is a lot less of that. Instead, I am keeping my attention in the present, revelling in the beauty that is already here, and appreciating the gifts that life is giving me today.

I have grown tired of feeling empty and dissatisfied when external goals aren’t reached. Or, striving to achieve them, only to find they don’t bring the deep, lasting satisfaction I crave. And I am over the idea of working hard, pushing and trying to make things happen.

I have realised that the desire to become more, achieve more and get more is ultimately driven by a feeling of discontent. A deep sense that where I am, what I have and who I am, is not enough right now. That in order to be happy, I have to improve my life, change myself and manifest bigger and better things.

 

Video: Step Back From Striving

As a result of this realisation, a new desire for 2015 has been born. This year I desire to step back from striving, and instead allow who I am, where I am and what I have to be enough, right now.

Yes, I will still be birthing new creations and manifesting desires, but it will come from a different space. I want to be effortlessly pulled towards them by a feeling of love and inspiration, rather than needing to achieve them so I can feel whole and complete. And I want to focus on feeling ‘enough’ right now so that the experience of these external results is just the icing on the cake of my already magnificent life.

Key take-aways from this video:

+ Step back from striving for more. Reflect on where you are setting goals from a space of discontentment and what areas of your life don’t feel enough just as they are.

+ Appreciate what you already have and how you are already experiencing what it is you desire. Thank life daily for the gifts it is giving you. Notice all the ways you do have enough, rather than all the ways you don’t.

+ Remember: “We manifest more, not by wanting more, but by appreciating what we already have.” (click to tweet)

+ Let yourself be enough just as you are. See your value, your gifts, your beauty and magnificence. Acknowledge them, recognise and love them.

 + You can want more in your life because it feels inspiring and exciting, without needing more in order to feel complete. Move towards your desires with love, passion and inspiration rather than need, control and attachment.

 

Would you love some support to break the striving pattern and finally feel ‘enough’? In my 1:1 coaching programs you will work closely with me and receive practical and personalised guidance.

Read more about my coaching options, or email me at connie@conniechapman.com to book a complimentary Discovery Session.

 

I would love to hear your thoughts on this video. In what ways do you find yourself striving for more? What would you love to practise instead? Share with me below.

With love,

Connie x

28 thoughts on “Are You Always Striving For More?”

  1. Hi, Connie! Beautiful message. I also feel as though I am always striving for more. Taking a step back and being grateful for who you are and what you have now is incredibly important, yet I personally do not practice that enough. I hope to make that change. Thank you! xx

    1. Amanda, I am so glad this message came as a beautiful reminder. It is so easy to take life for granted and forget to give thanks for all of it’s little gifts. But it is such a powerful practise! x

  2. Hi Connie! You always seem to have perfect timing on posting videos relevant to what I’m experiencing right now. For the past couple weeks, I’ve been feeling so uninspired and empty, because I felt sad that I didn’t accomplish even MORE this year. But if I keep having this mindset, no year or version of myself will ever feel good enough. I’ll keep striving for more and more and more, never seeing all of the amazing things that I DID get to do. I’m definitely going to try and work on feeling “enough” this year. Thanks for your beautiful insight!!

    1. Oh Caylee, sound like this message was delivered right for you! I love how we are always lead to what we need to hear. Enjoy the practise of letting who you are and where you are now be not only enough, but also be perfect and beautiful, just as it is. Stay in touch and let me know how you go xx

  3. Such a gorgeous message, Connie. I loved this one. Whole is one of my core desired feelings so I always try to recognise my wholeness rather than seeking happiness and more outside of myself. And it’s so reassuring knowing that if something is meant for me it won’t pass me by. Happy New Year beautiful! x

    1. Oh Fran, WHOLE is a word I am working with too this year. Along with FULL. Recognising our inner wholeness is one of the most beautiful practices we can take on board xx

  4. Hi! I had problems with this “enough thing” during the last two years. It was not only that I wanted MORE for me, but wanted to do MORE in any aspect of my life: I used to think that I didn’t spend enough time with my parents, I didn’t work enough in the NGO I work as a volunteer, I didn’t prepared enough any meeting or lesson (as I worked as a tutor with three guys)… For two years I though that I WAS NOT ENOUGH, in general.
    But then I found this quote:
    “Relax. You are enough. You have enough. You do enough”.
    And printed and sticked it to my board, near my desk. So when I feel like my life is not enough or that I am not doing enough I look at the quote and think about it.
    Thank you for this beautiful post.

    1. You are not alone Irene, so many of us walk around with a deep feeling within us that we are not good enough. It is beautiful you recognised that and began taking the steps to transform it. And it sounds like now this post has come as further conformation of that powerful truth xx

  5. Connie,

    I really felt your power speaking in this video. I resonate deeply with your message now and in the past. Your work has been about being deeply present with where we are and who we are now. And it’s beautiful to see that coming to a head this year. I’m excited to see where this takes you.

    One of my biggest ‘goals’ for the year is to be so Divinely Guided. For me this means sinking into the Now and trusting that I am in fact in the perfect place, with the perfect people, saying the perfect thing. And that what is Divinely mine will arrive right on Divine time. There’s no need for striving, like you mentioned. I simply am to remain present for what is already Divinely mine and available to receive it.

    With love,
    Paula

    1. Ah yes Paula, sinking in to that place of surrender and deeply listening to our guidance and the divine plan is where it is at!! And you are so right, in that place there is nothing to strive for as it will all be provided at the exact right time xx

  6. Similarly this really rings true for me this year …

    “All desires are the inappropriate substitute for the desire to be at one with God” Radhanath Swami

    Being at “one with God” for me is being at one with everything. In a place of non resistance to whatever arises in the moment. God is in everything and in me too. Being “at one with God” through meditation or in every moment. That is truly all I desire and the only reason I set any goals for “more”. It’s all about feeling that oneness for me. So that’s my only “goal” this year. “Being at one with God”. And “goal” even implies it’s out there to get. It’s actually just “being” it, right now.

    I love all these messages that are aligning around letting go of striving and achieving. Thank you for yours xx Mish

    1. I love what you wrote. That is exactly how I feel. Goal often feels like something external I have to achieve to allow myself to feel that ‘beingness’ or ‘oneness’ within. All that we are truly seeking is the ultimate feeling of the oneness of our being. Happy New Year!

    2. Wow Mish, I found myself reading your comment over and over because your words were so freaking gorgeous. I absolutely love that practise of non-resistance, being one with God and remembering it is all within us. Thank you for sharing your beautiful perspective xx

  7. OH WOW! Did I just feel some tension wash out and feel a huge smile in that I have found someone who so beautifully articulated what I have been hearing inside. ENOUGH of the ‘need this’ ‘need that’ to feel complete. We are already perfect just as we are, if we choose to look deep inside and see it.

    I think the whole new year flurry to set goals and intentions makes me giggle a little. I choose (probably because I’m lazy, but I will take it as being intuitive!) to see the turn of the new year as just another day. Another day is actively choose how I want to feel, what I will spend time doing. Another day to reflect on what matters most to me and what therefore will get more of my energy, love and focus.

    When I come from this place I don’t need goals- I just feel my way through and you know what? It always ends up reaping rewards.

    I laughed today hearing on a radio station in south east asia some ‘guru’ talking about goal setting. It was so clinical it just made me erupt into fits of laughter. So dry, un-soulful and full of failure thereafter I say (I say this not to be negative but because goals with purpose rule- always. period).

    Great video Connie.
    Sarah xx

    1. Oh Sarah, YES feeling your way through the year is delicious and allows you to be guided moment by moment and live in the flow. I love that you were guided to this post to receive further confirmation of the intuitive knowing you had already been feeling. Keep trusting that inner voice hun, sound like it is spot on xx

  8. Hi Connie, I found you through my lovely english teacher that realy likes you, and I´m so glad that she introduced your blog to me.
    I woud like to thank you for your dedication and how you show so much love through your words.
    I deeply resonate with your ideas and the way that you view life. I was feeling exactly like you said in the video and after recieving your mesage, the feeling of wholeness within me became stronger.
    Love from Brazil Xx

    1. Hi Emilene, thank you for your beautiful words and I am so glad you were guided here! I love that you can actually feel that sense of wholeness in your body. Connecting with that feeling on a daily basis will be one of the most powerful things you can do xx

  9. That is exactly what happened to me when I went to set my goals for 2015 and reflect on 2014- and it was kind of awful. It’s scary to trust that it’s ok to stop striving, and feel good enough where I am, but I know that’s exactly what I need to do. Thank you for the beautiful video 🙂

    1. Beautiful to hear you can relate Kirstin. It is interesting to notice the fear that arises when we think about not striving, but that is a powerful thing to explore. Would love to hear how you go with this x

  10. Love this video Connie. It’s like you read my mind. I have been going through Danielle La Porte’s Desire map nutting out my CDF for 2015 and looking at the part where you use your CDF’s to come up with your goals. And my inner guide clearly said to me, you only need to make small short term goals and actions – don’t come up with goals for the year.

    It felt so right. I know that it’s because like you, I am sick of feeling disappointed when I don’t achieve my grand visions and goals that I set for myself. 2014 was the year that I was cracked open to the deep spiritual work where previously I had been dabbling. Through the course of last year I have developed a much stronger connection with spirit and my inner guide and I’ve come to realise that the Universe knows far better than I do what I need and where I need to go.

    Consequently I really no longer feel the need to set myself goals to achieve. My focus is more on focusing on how I want to feel, and being guided to what I can do day-to-day, moment-to-moment to access those feelings. By staying connected to my inner guidance system and my CDF I know that things will unravel in a way far beyond what I could imagine right now.

    N x x

    1. I agree Nicola, Danielle La Porte’s work has really revolutionised goal setting! I too am working with lots of short term goals, doing some mini monthly planning, but that is all. But the feelings and ways of being I want to practise are extending through the whole year. It sounds like you are right on track for a magical year xx

  11. Connie, thank you so so much for sharing this! It is such a beautiful message, and one that I am going to keep on listening to help me in my current situation. It’s so helpful and reassuring to hear your thoughts on this, knowing that I am not the only one who feels this way. It is so calming and relieving to be able to let go of the fear of not being enough, and just enjoy and appreciate what we have now!
    To hear you speak so passionately about this makes me even more excited and inspired to strive to feel this way!
    In May I am beginning the Beautiful You Life Coaching course, and I hope that one day I am able to share these soulful messages with others, just as you do. You are a true inspiration- I hope you feel proud and fulfilled, as you have touched so many people’s lives and helped them find love within themselves.
    Thank you for all that you do, you are truly amazing!
    Heidi xx

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